These are in no particular order. This is just my pure stream of consciousness in play mode. You might want to buckle up for the ride into my mind. I mean, if you want to. But seriously, safety first.

🌀I’m a Gryffindor, but my daughter thinks I’m a Ravenclaw.

🌀But really, I’m a dryad. And a mountain stream. And a fierce light warrior. And a butterfly. And an eagle. And an owl. And a crow. And a Lighthouse. And I like to think I’m friends with the whales in the invisible realms.

🌀Oh! And a hobbit. Okay, mostly I need first lunch and second lunch, and I can play the part of a hobbit since I’m 4’11 with hobbit feet. I don’t think that’s enough to actually BE a hobbit, though.

That’s all the outside stuff. I’m more interested in the inside stuff. That’s where I live most of the time.

🌀I often use tea bags more than once because I grew up kind of poor, and I’m still that thrifty.

🌀I grew up thinking I was just like Lucy, but really I’ve been just like Charlie Brown on that football field. I’m learning!

🌀I AM Mirabel from Encanto. My family thought I was Bruno, though. They convinced me for a while too.

🌀Okay, fine. I’m all the characters from Encanto. And it is actually fine.

I embrace All of Me, which is the prereq to embracing All of You.

🌀And I’m NOT Glinda. And I’m Not Mary from Little House on the Prairie. Knowing our “Not Me’s” is just as important as our “Me’s”. My daughter is Mary, which felt like an alien species to me, but I embraced all of her in all her Mary ways! And how wonderful for a Laura to have a Mary for a daughter. And how wonderful for an Anne with an E to have a Diana for a daughter.

Have you noticed one of my favorite words is AND?

🌀I have a carved wooden ampersand in my office because I love it so much.

This AND this AND this AND Not That AND Not That.

🌀Discovering more about ourselves is like a creating a Pandora station. We need to thumbs up AND thumbs down things in our life to get to a life we truly love and to our true essence. AND, we need to change some of our thumbs downs. We’ve all thumbs downed parts of ourselves because somebody convinced us they weren’t acceptable. That’s really messing up our stations. It’s keeping out whole genres of songs we actually love, but we forgot we love them. I’m embracing all the songs that I actually love, and I’m releasing the ones somebody else programmed into my station. One thumbs up and one thumbs down at a time, in progress forever.

🌀I have actually thumbs downed running, horror movies, kale (I tried so hard to thumbs up it!), going out into the matrix too much, and toxic hierarchies. And by horror movies, I mean anything much more dramatic than Disney movies. And by into the matrix too much, I mean more than a few hours a week. I have thumbs upped embodied flow, dancing, paddleboarding, and Queer Eye.

🌀I love walking daily in both the literal forest and the enchanted forest of inner transformation.

I made that last one up, and it’s also real.

🌀I would come back to Earth for many lifetimes just to learn to sing. I have a singers soul, dammit!

🌀My dryer has been broken for three weeks, and I haven’t dealt with it yet. I can’t do everything right when I want to, but I know I will get it done. I trust divine timing and when the energy flows toward something, even on dryers. The Divine actually does care about our seemingly small human stuff too. AND, I struggle with overwhelm. That has actually helped me trust divine timing and guidance. You know, as a last resort, after overwhelm broke me open. But, lesson learned. And, still learning it a little more every day. It’s hard for our humans to learn to trust our higher selves!

🌀I’m still getting to know myself beyond my conditioning. I love the ongoing process of DISCOVERY! My 17 year old daughter helps. 17 year olds have no issues with holding up the mirror for us, which is so great. I want honest mirrors in my life. I don’t want the be the fairest of them all. I want to be the MOST MYSELF of them all!

It’s really true that I have a million dreams keeping me awake.

🌀And I really do think about what the world could be, a vision of the one I see. And I really do believe a million dreams is all it’s gonna take, a million dreams for the world we’re gonna make. I am an optimist by nature, too much so sometimes. It has been easy and natural for me to see the Light. I had to learn in some of the hard ways to see the darkness, get realistic about it, and become skillful with it.

🌀In about 100 more lifetimes, I aspire to be more like Lin Manuel Miranda. It’s going to take me that long, and it will be worth it.

🌀I have weirdly good night vision, and I’ve been a night owl since I was a baby. It’s like I was made to be a SHADOWWORKER and see in the dark.

🌀It turns out my Prince Charming might be a Divine Queen, and so am I. Two Divine Queens together. AND not queens, because let’s get rid of the toxic hierarchies and realize no one is higher or better. Two Sovereign Queens! I found out the hard ways that Prince Charming is a myth. No one outside ourSelves is coming to whisk us off the the castle and rescue us from all our troubles. I know, it’s a lot to grieve. Being rescued does sound relaxing! We CAN trust our own INNER COMPASSES to guide us instead of trusting everyone else who thought or pretended they had OUR unique answers for OUR unique highest paths, especially princes.

But Divine Wild Souls ARE real!

🌀We come in all shapes, sizes, colors, personalities, gender identities, sexual orientations, neurodiversities, ages, divine essences, vibrations, frequencies, and rhythms. We’re all now rescuing ourselves with a little help from our friends. Every single one of us who chooses to be on an inner healing journey is adding to the greater good and helping to concreate a more beautiful and true world for all of us. Well, the world is already very beautiful. It’s humanity that needs a glow up, and we’re doing it! The force is within us! We rise together!

🌀And while I’m on the patriarchy, there isn’t actually a father-knows-best or a mother-knows-best either. Something in each of us knows best for ourselves. It’s a very compelling fantasy that someone else knows best and can give us the answers. It’s no wonder it sold so well for centuries.

I say “fuck the patriarchy” daily.

🌀But really what I mean is, take all your fucks away from the patriarchy. Don’t give them any of your fucks. Lets build a non-kingdom of fierce egalitarianism!

🌀I’ll wait on sharing my Santa soapbox. I don’t want to alienate you right away. AND I still give my daughter presents from Santa. I just also give her presents from Mrs. Claus and the Elves! They do all the work, and Santa shows up to take the credit on the big day. Patriarchy much? Okay, I went ahead with part of my Santa rant. I’m also a bit impulsive sometimes. I do have ADHD.

🌀And while I’m still on the patriarchy, I’m rewriting the song, I Need A Hero to I NEED REAL. I DON’T need a hero who’s gotta be strong and larger than life. I mean, I kind of want one, but I’m moving on. I’m not holding on til the end of the night. I’m letting go. The night will never end if we keep doing that! And fuck larger than life. How about we just do real life now? I’ll get back to you with the rest of my rewrite. Or maybe I won’t. I do have ADHD. Okay, NOW I’ll be done with soapboxes about the patriarchy. For now.

🌀Clearly I’m being kept awake with both a million dreams and a million wonderings. I do struggle with insomnia. Since I can remember. But worse since my divorce, even though leaving was the best gift he ever gave me. Except his sperm. I’m not saying he gave me our daughter. She gets to take credit for herself. He freed me when I wouldn’t have done it. I was too stubborn to listen to my higher self on that one. I was too busy recycling my conditioning. It doesn’t turn out fun when we do that. I have corrected the matter.

🌀In astrology, Lilith represents the wild feminine that can’t be tamed. She’s in my first house in astrology, which means I can’t hide that aspect of myself even if I wanted to. Can you tell?

Yes, that IS a fun ride in a patriarchy, thanks for asking!

🌀I have embraced this now! I’m in the wild. Come on out, it’s nice out here! I am divine and wild. So are you.

🌀I thought I was spending decades becoming a master trauma therapist. It turns out that was just a training ground and foundation for becoming a shadowworker, transformational healer, and spiritual awakening guide. I did not see that coming.

🌀I think it just went from bad to worse on telling people what I do at parties.

🌀My higher self is a genius. So is yours. I’m not. I’ve accepted that. It only took me 48 years to accept that. It’s great to have friends in high places looking after us. But I’m still amazing too! Some of the time. I need to be kept in check sometimes, but I try really hard. I listen to my higher self and she listens to me, and we’re an amazing team. We both like to pass the ball. Okay, I don’t always like it, but I’ve learned to be very thankful that I don’t have to carry the ball all the time. That’s exhausting. It’s no way to live!

I have realized I am a barefoot Mystic. I literally walk around in the forest barefoot contemplating the nature of the universe. A lot.

🌀Since my second awakening journey ignited, I’ve gotten in touch with some spiritual gifts, but I don’t love to go on about them. I chose to avoid/resist these gifts for a long time. I now choose to embrace them. My basic assessment is that my higher self has all kinds of badass skills that seem magical to us humans, and sometimes she shares those gifts with me and others, on an as needed basis. I trust her in this completely. She’s proven herself.

My ever evolving truest essence right now, while I’m on earth, is the whole team. All of my divine and all of my human, alchemized into my current truest essence. And I’ll keep getting to know her better forever.